I'm gonna be making some changes to the blog (title, and design mainly.) Any and all suggestions are welcome.
I've been slowly getting back on track with my writing. I've realized that I've become a visual writer, or a writer that sees the scene playing out in their mind, and then freaks out because the timing of everything is all so wrong compared to now. Example of that being, part of my story that I'm working on takes place at a very famous theme park which has been remodeled since I started writing this story. It makes writing the scene harder. I wanted my story to take place in 2006, but it's hard to when things are so different now.
My other story, which was a series I wrote with an old friend is also stuck. I can't write my MC without her sounding so vapid and conceited. Again, changes in the last few years, including technology, and locations.
I think a writing retreat is in order. I'm thinking Vegas since that is where my stories have some scenes. Maybe San Diego....
Friday, August 2, 2013
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
Digging Up my Roots
When I was in the hospital, my condition was complicated by a simple truth.
I'm adopted, and don't know my family history.
Every nurse, and doctor in the hospital that treated me had asked if I knew if there was a family history of heart problems, or ulcers, or anything that could explain my condition. All I could do was shake my head and cry.
It brought me back to something I had been pondering since I was eighteen. Should I look for my birth parents?
My(adopted) parents have always been my parents, my support system and well my parents!! I always knew I was adopted, and my parents told me that there was nothing wrong with that. My mom would buy my sister and I Cabbage Patch Dolls because you "adopted" them. Mom also told me that I couldn't look for my birth parents because she didn't want someone else to take me away. I later found out that something similar happened to them before I was born. The birth mother came back for their child....
The social worker who had worked on my case had prepared a book that I read all the time, and gave a very very vague history of my birth parents.
When I turned eighteen, finding my birth parents was of no concern to me. I had turned out pretty decent, except for having wonky knees. Throughout my adulthood, the thought had crossed my mind, but I never really thought anything of it. Steph was adopted, and met her birth mom and sister before she passed away. I thought about it, but I remember what my mom had said, and I would let it go...
So the heart attack brought that thought up to the surface. I was concerned about my health, and truly wondered if I could have a disposition to other illnesses or defects. Also I wonder if I have brothers or sisters out there.
One day in February, I pulled Mom aside, and I had explained my situation, and that I wanted to look for my birth parents. I was expecting her to break down and cry, or get overly emotional She wasn't. She was actually surprised that I was asking for her okay, and that it was for the selfish medical reason, and not any other selfish reason.
Here's my first attempt to get any info. This is all I know really:
I was born January 8, 1980 at about 1030 am at Kaiser Hospital in Fontana.
My mom and dad were 20 at the time.
They named me Donna.
If you can help, please leave me a message.
thanks
So the heart attack brought that thought up to the surface. I was concerned about my health, and truly wondered if I could have a disposition to other illnesses or defects. Also I wonder if I have brothers or sisters out there.
One day in February, I pulled Mom aside, and I had explained my situation, and that I wanted to look for my birth parents. I was expecting her to break down and cry, or get overly emotional She wasn't. She was actually surprised that I was asking for her okay, and that it was for the selfish medical reason, and not any other selfish reason.
Here's my first attempt to get any info. This is all I know really:
I was born January 8, 1980 at about 1030 am at Kaiser Hospital in Fontana.
My mom and dad were 20 at the time.
They named me Donna.
If you can help, please leave me a message.
thanks
More apologies, and regrets
So much has changed since February, and yet things feel so stagnant. Again, I feel bad for disappointing you guys and girls.
I'm trying not to make this an update post, but I have a feeling it will be. My apologies in advance.
First and foremost, I have a new car!! It's sad that I'm 33 and this is my first car, but so be it. It's a Hyundai Elantra, and its such an upgrade...
I'm still working where I am. It's a media company specializing in the phone book. It's a fun job, but can be stressful and boring at the same time. It's a long term temp assignment, so I keep looking elsewhere.
Dad had his surgery at the end of March. It turned out to be a quadruple bypass, but he came out of it like a pro. He's been slowly returning back to his normal life, which relieves me so much.
I've been given a clean bill of health from my Cardiologist. I'm still on some meds, but my hope is to be off one or two by the end of the year.
Not much else going on sadly. I go to the gym three days a week, and I try and write as much as I can.
Hubby is still looking for work. Damn this economy!!
I'll have another thought provoking post later...I just had to get this junk off my chest.
I'm trying not to make this an update post, but I have a feeling it will be. My apologies in advance.
First and foremost, I have a new car!! It's sad that I'm 33 and this is my first car, but so be it. It's a Hyundai Elantra, and its such an upgrade...
I'm still working where I am. It's a media company specializing in the phone book. It's a fun job, but can be stressful and boring at the same time. It's a long term temp assignment, so I keep looking elsewhere.
Dad had his surgery at the end of March. It turned out to be a quadruple bypass, but he came out of it like a pro. He's been slowly returning back to his normal life, which relieves me so much.
I've been given a clean bill of health from my Cardiologist. I'm still on some meds, but my hope is to be off one or two by the end of the year.
Not much else going on sadly. I go to the gym three days a week, and I try and write as much as I can.
Hubby is still looking for work. Damn this economy!!
I'll have another thought provoking post later...I just had to get this junk off my chest.
Friday, February 1, 2013
Apologies, regrets and doctor's bills.
Apologies that I have not posted in like forever.
I have been busy with many a trial and a tribulation. My father had a heart attack, along with discovering several blood clots in his chest and legs, and maybe even thrombosis in his leg. It was very scary, and trying on the family. For me, it was especially painful having to be away from my family, and having to fight over something as stupid as the dog, and even me having to move back home to take care of the family
Regrets that I let it get to me.
My family is the most important thing in my life. When I went through my divorce, they were there for me, and in fact had helped me in that hard time. We are always there for each other, and we do the best we can with what we can do. I was only working part time retail, and I really could have moved back in with my parents to help keep them as healthy as I possibly could. My husband and I had some fundamental disagreements about said plans. He felt (and still does really) that my family takes advantage of my kindness and endless empathy. This situation, and other stresses in my life took it's toll on me.
Doctor's bills suck
On January second, I had a heart attack.
You read that right....
The best way to explain the pain was as if someone was standing on my chest, or as someone later pointed out, having a car parked on top of you.
At about 4 am my husband decided that I needed to go to the hospital. Obviously I was hesitant, claiming it was everything from indigestion to the pulled pec.
I have been busy with many a trial and a tribulation. My father had a heart attack, along with discovering several blood clots in his chest and legs, and maybe even thrombosis in his leg. It was very scary, and trying on the family. For me, it was especially painful having to be away from my family, and having to fight over something as stupid as the dog, and even me having to move back home to take care of the family
Regrets that I let it get to me.
My family is the most important thing in my life. When I went through my divorce, they were there for me, and in fact had helped me in that hard time. We are always there for each other, and we do the best we can with what we can do. I was only working part time retail, and I really could have moved back in with my parents to help keep them as healthy as I possibly could. My husband and I had some fundamental disagreements about said plans. He felt (and still does really) that my family takes advantage of my kindness and endless empathy. This situation, and other stresses in my life took it's toll on me.
Doctor's bills suck
On January second, I had a heart attack.
You read that right....
I had a heart attack
I was having chest pain for about a week, but I had originally thought I had pulled a pectoral muscle while working out at the gym. The pain went away for a few days, and then subsided.
At about 10:30 on the first, I was having said pains again, and no matter what I could do, I could not get comfortable. I tried and failed miserably to get into a somewhat comfortable position. Standing hurt, sitting hurt, reclined was painful, and flat on my back was the worst.
The best way to explain the pain was as if someone was standing on my chest, or as someone later pointed out, having a car parked on top of you.
At about 4 am my husband decided that I needed to go to the hospital. Obviously I was hesitant, claiming it was everything from indigestion to the pulled pec.
The drive to the hospital is thankfully short. We live pretty much up the street from the place. I waited all of five minutes before I was taken back to be examined. They did an EKG, and it looked normal. The nurse who was awesome and explained all my options. Either go home, or have cardio blood work. I went ahead, and had the blood drawn. They also had changed doctors...and he told me my diagnosis.
Hubby and I were in shock. Soon after, they whisked me away to have a cardiac catheterisation . They drugged me up, and sent me into an operating room. The entered thru my groin, and into my heart.
I could feel them in my heart, and it was freaky. Apparently one of the major blood vessels in my heart closed up. Freaky stuff.
After that, I was in the ICU. I caught up on a ton of sleep, or as much as I could with monitors on my chest, two IV's in my right arm, and a blood pressure cuff on my left arm.
The next afternoon, I went home. I took the rest of the week off, and went back to work that Monday.
I have a newer perspective on life from this. I don't sweat the small stuff nearly as much as I used to. I'm considering becoming a vegetarian and cutting out the soda. I'm trying to take my exercise more seriously, although having to start from square one.
There is so much more that has happened...and I'l try and update more, but this is it for now
Hubby and I were in shock. Soon after, they whisked me away to have a cardiac catheterisation . They drugged me up, and sent me into an operating room. The entered thru my groin, and into my heart.
I could feel them in my heart, and it was freaky. Apparently one of the major blood vessels in my heart closed up. Freaky stuff.
After that, I was in the ICU. I caught up on a ton of sleep, or as much as I could with monitors on my chest, two IV's in my right arm, and a blood pressure cuff on my left arm.
The next afternoon, I went home. I took the rest of the week off, and went back to work that Monday.
I have a newer perspective on life from this. I don't sweat the small stuff nearly as much as I used to. I'm considering becoming a vegetarian and cutting out the soda. I'm trying to take my exercise more seriously, although having to start from square one.
There is so much more that has happened...and I'l try and update more, but this is it for now
Saturday, October 20, 2012
Quick Announcement
I'm working part time, doing retail (blech)
I'm doing NaNoWriMo this year.
More details to come. :)
I'm doing NaNoWriMo this year.
More details to come. :)
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Adventures in Mom sitting
Yes folks, you read that right, mom sitting.
Some background info....
My mom is not well, she's on oxygen, she falls a lot, and well, she doesn't feel like she should be home alone for long periods of time.
My dad, sister and her husband are out of town at a car show, and I get to spend the weekend with my mom, and my dog, Licorice.
It was pretty much a cake walk, just cleaning, playing tug of war with Lick, doing laundry, stuff like that.
One thing that did freak me out was early Saturday Morning, the heater in the house turned on for some strange reason. The smell of burning dust awoke me from my sleep. I as already nervous about something happening when that happened. I turned off the heater, made sure mom was okay, and tried to go back to sleep.
It was nice to be with my mom, and to be at my parent's house again. I could do whatever I want really. Something that caused the hubby and I to fight, but that's another time really.
On a different note, I lost 7 pounds in the last two weeks. My cousin, the personal trainer, hooked me up with a great app, and I've cut my calories down to about 1400. Only time will tell if this works, but stepping on the scale, I feel damn good right now.
Some background info....
My mom is not well, she's on oxygen, she falls a lot, and well, she doesn't feel like she should be home alone for long periods of time.
My dad, sister and her husband are out of town at a car show, and I get to spend the weekend with my mom, and my dog, Licorice.
It was pretty much a cake walk, just cleaning, playing tug of war with Lick, doing laundry, stuff like that.
One thing that did freak me out was early Saturday Morning, the heater in the house turned on for some strange reason. The smell of burning dust awoke me from my sleep. I as already nervous about something happening when that happened. I turned off the heater, made sure mom was okay, and tried to go back to sleep.
It was nice to be with my mom, and to be at my parent's house again. I could do whatever I want really. Something that caused the hubby and I to fight, but that's another time really.
On a different note, I lost 7 pounds in the last two weeks. My cousin, the personal trainer, hooked me up with a great app, and I've cut my calories down to about 1400. Only time will tell if this works, but stepping on the scale, I feel damn good right now.
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)